[Scien really is fucking atrocious. Outside of uncontrolled murder, Eunhyuk has been very kind to Viktor, so while Eunhyuk doesn't interest HIM that way either, he has to take a moment to figure out why he is so fucking offended on Eunhyuk's behalf at the dismissal.
This is what having emotions is like!! The struggle of separating bolstering your friends from the simple fact someone else can say they're mid.]
Well, to me then. He has his own sort of charm. And apparently to some others, too, I guess. [...] I... didn't follow up to ask him if he was rejected actually...
We can't all have the confidence of Scien Brofiise. We didn't understand love any more than you did even though we could feel it. It took some time to reconcile. The other people aren't an object or a goal for us. We weren't simply going to "take" it as ours.
My lover is neither an object nor a goal to me, nor is he someone I took for myself.
[and maybe that's not what viktor meant, but scien can't let the implication just stand. he doesn't seem offended, because he isn't surprised that someone might think of him that way but.]
Your other points stand. [he is insanely confident and he didn't (doesn't?) understand love] But I have never wanted love or another person. [it's not a checkbox or a mission he has]
He simply wanted me, and, despite myself, I wanted him too—more than I wanted to be sensible. As long as that was true, I wasn't going to deny either of us what we both sought.
[scien's affection might be hard to understand—but it is as devoted as he is to anything else in his life]
[He had sort of been implying it to see if Scien would deny it or not. He's got to say, he's a little surprised to hear it even if he knows he shouldn't be. Glad to hear lovers aren't goals or objects to Scien.]
You shouldn't try to logic it out. That's how it works, I think. I'm not an expert, but... it just... falls together that way with no sense at all.
Did you end up solving the one puzzle I said you couldn't?
[Trying not to laugh again. Not about what Scien says exactly. This man is so stupid while being very brilliant. AS IF VIKTOR ISN'T THE SAME. HE DOESN'T LAUGH, but still.]
A lifetime for yourself and pursuits and now maybe a lifetime enjoying being alive?
I know, but you should try to at least enjoy some of it. Even though you hopefully have plenty of more authentic years now, you don't want to miss out on even some of them with the person you care about.
[Look. He's still the very emotional one between the two of them.]
Are they going back with you? Depending on how all of this goes.
I think it's less that and more... just amiable conversation. Though I don't begrudge you for not caring about small talk. That's why Jayce was the face of Hextech. I'm bad with small talk, and I hate parties.
[Very funny that he will now experience yet ANOTHER party.]
[He is quiet for a long moment, tying to think of how he wants to respond.]
I di... I didn't think I did. I was sad when I was young, that the other children avoided me, that I couldn't play with them because I couldn't go where they went, couldn't swim. But later... I didn't think about it.
Creating, getting into the Academy... it's the only thing that mattered. But I guess... after Jayce, after... here... it would be difficult to... go back to a life without others nearby.
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This is what having emotions is like!! The struggle of separating bolstering your friends from the simple fact someone else can say they're mid.]
Well, to me then. He has his own sort of charm. And apparently to some others, too, I guess. [...] I... didn't follow up to ask him if he was rejected actually...
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He wasn't.
[how does he know this when he just spent the entire convo calling eunhyuk mid]
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I told him. I don't know why he was so worried in hearing what I had to say about it.
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It sounds like you're both cowards.
[getting other people's input on love..... why....]
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Maybe to you.
[Not that it amounts to much.]
We can't all have the confidence of Scien Brofiise. We didn't understand love any more than you did even though we could feel it. It took some time to reconcile. The other people aren't an object or a goal for us. We weren't simply going to "take" it as ours.
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[and maybe that's not what viktor meant, but scien can't let the implication just stand. he doesn't seem offended, because he isn't surprised that someone might think of him that way but.]
Your other points stand. [he is insanely confident and he didn't (doesn't?) understand love] But I have never wanted love or another person. [it's not a checkbox or a mission he has]
He simply wanted me, and, despite myself, I wanted him too—more than I wanted to be sensible. As long as that was true, I wasn't going to deny either of us what we both sought.
[scien's affection might be hard to understand—but it is as devoted as he is to anything else in his life]
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You shouldn't try to logic it out. That's how it works, I think. I'm not an expert, but... it just... falls together that way with no sense at all.
Did you end up solving the one puzzle I said you couldn't?
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Don't call it a puzzle if logic can't be applied to it.
It is a feeling, and those also aren't things of logic or reason.
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Well, it sounds like you may solved it after all actually.
[He's mostly teasing. But it's true. Solving love means admitting it can't be solved in any coherent way.]
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No, no. You're not a moron. You were always just...
[TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW HE WANTS TO SAY...]
Yourself.
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I have been myself for over eighty years.
Ideally, I will be myself for only eighty more.
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A lifetime for yourself and pursuits and now maybe a lifetime enjoying being alive?
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You drastically underestimate the number of headaches I have to deal with upon returning home. I have my work cut out for me for at least ten years.
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[Look. He's still the very emotional one between the two of them.]
Are they going back with you? Depending on how all of this goes.
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[even if we don't get worldhopping, scien is confident he can replicate the technology in a few months]
Don't lecture me on how to handle my relationship. I don't tell you how to look after your gremlin.
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Well, you did bully me into returning words he had given me first. It wasn't a lecture, promise. We're trying to work on your friendly conversation.
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[jUST NO]
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Come now, you can't rely on Dahut forever.
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I have no interest in being friendly for the sake of lip service. People's bruised egos have nothing to do with me.
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I think it's less that and more... just amiable conversation. Though I don't begrudge you for not caring about small talk. That's why Jayce was the face of Hextech. I'm bad with small talk, and I hate parties.
[Very funny that he will now experience yet ANOTHER party.]
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Some company is fine in bursts, but I'm not some lonely person who needs to be trained into friendship like some other maladjusted wrecks around here.
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I suppose this includes me as well?
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I don't know. You seem like you crave relationships with other people.
[probably as a result of being ostracized from society, if scien were to guess]
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I di... I didn't think I did. I was sad when I was young, that the other children avoided me, that I couldn't play with them because I couldn't go where they went, couldn't swim. But later... I didn't think about it.
Creating, getting into the Academy... it's the only thing that mattered. But I guess... after Jayce, after... here... it would be difficult to... go back to a life without others nearby.
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