[He sort of immediately feels bad about the flowers and--well, everything else. The hand lifts off hers, but there isn't much he can do about either, so it lowers on top of it again to rub it.
His eyes dip to the collar, then up again.]
That sounds about as insane as he acted, yes. [WEIRDO. WHY DID I SAY THAT DUDE WAS HOT NOOOOOOOOO. I GOT ZEUSIFIED!!!!!!!] ...I remember the shape of the key. If you ever... happened to want it.
[HSLDJKFK HELP to be fair he's very 90s anime villain so you know
she exhales slow, looking down at their hands.]
... But I didn't earn it. [she says, finally. hesitantly. she's running out of reasons why she needs to keep it on, when people have tried so hard to find her a solution. it's a little scary to think of life without it. where does she go, after that? what does she do, when the only thing she's ever wanted is achieved?
a pause.]
Not... not yet. But maybe - before we leave. If we get the chance.
His smile is small, but still reassuring. He reaches up to tuck some hair behind one of her ears.]
It's not something you have to earn, you know. Freedom... That's a right. That's a right everyone has, and you shouldn't ever have to do anything to earn it. But I understand.
If you decide to, I've always got it-- [Taps one of his temples.] I had one, too. In the rift. Even though I knew it wasn't true, it felt like a yoke I was supposed to have.
[she closes her eyes when he does so, chewing at her bottom lip.
you shouldn't have to earn it, he says, but. it doesn't change the fact that she feels like she needs to. she was so close. she was almost there, she was reaching for it, and then she woke up here. it feels wrong, to just have it.
maybe if she can make it to the end. maybe then she'll feel like she deserves it.]
... You get so used to it. [she opens her eyes again, looking at him.] It's always there.
[another sigh.]
When we first arrived, weeks ago, you told me that parents are supposed to love you. [...] You have seen, now, what it was like, but... your words stuck with me.
[she's quiet for a long moment, still looking down at their hands.
and then very carefully, she smiles, looking up at him. it's a little bit of a fragile thing, but it's there, and it doesn't break or fade.]
Yes, I've... definitely found that to be the truth. [family is who you make it.] If anything, being here has only made that truth stronger.
Viktor, you have been gone so long, but... you are important to me. You were one of the first people to be kind to me without any expectation of something in return, here.
[OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, a Throné smile!!!! This makes him so happy! He doesn't turn into a big golden retriever like Sidon, but he does brighten slightly in his expression.]
You never tried to hurt me, so. Not even a rude word.
[He pulls his hands carefully away from hers, instead reaching up to put them behind her shoulders and beckon her forward toward himself. Hug! He's going to wrap one arm around her shoulders and rest one on the back of her head. He has learned A TOUCH!]
I hope you've been doing okay, Throné. And if you aren't, I don't mind listening.
she goes easily! so much easier than she used to, she exhales shakily and just leans in and hugs him back, warm. she probably smells good, vanilla and campfire, pleasantly woodsy. she rests her head on his shoulder for a moment, fingers tangling into the back of his shirt.]
I'm alright. It's... been back and forth. [between like incredible amounts of despair and incredible amounts of joy, but] You told me to write down the things I wanted to tell you when we met in the virtual reality, and I did.
[A giant fish man has taught him that sometimes, people really need a good hug. That's just the way of things. He squeezes her gently, then rubs the back of her shoulders.
GET HUGGED, IDIOD.]
I want to read it. [He squandered Sky's words, all of them written down for him to read after the worst happened. He won't do this with Throné.] I can't wait to read it actually, thank you.
[Okay, okay, well, at THIS, he does loosen his arms so he can lean back so he can SEE HER FACE. >:) He has a somewhat mischievous, but mostly happy grin to his face.]
chokes on more flowers, this time olive and periwinkle among the cherry blossom. when she can manage to speak without choking, she just does the :bunsweat: emote in vibes.]
Both of his brows riiiiiiise, and he kind of has a cross between an expectant look and a look that says he is understanding from her silence she did NOT tell him shit about fuck, and he probably didn't tell HER shit about fuck because they're both fucking STUPID.
He lowers his hands to gathers her up again.] I was scared, [he admits.] Terrified. I am still very scared. [A pause. Quietly:] ...I've had this conversation already with someone. [Exasperated. He shakes his head.]
I am still very scared for so many reasons. I don't know how any of this is going to end. I was dead, and I could barely communicate. I had never... experienced these feelings before in my life. I'm sick... with no much longer to live. I was being blown up, I'm pretty sure, right before getting here. My body is... hideous, if I'm honest. Our lifespans may be completely different. I don't want to hurt anyone.
And that's just me.
...But I can't keep letting the present slip out of my fingers anymore because I'm too worried about all of that happening.
[protests first actually, you shut up!! a pause, though, as she absorbs the rest of it. she allows him to take her hands, but squirms slightly. her collar feels so heavy around her neck.]
... I offered Lucien a place in Solistia, while we figure things out. If you want to come as well. I know that's a lot to consider, but... but I didn't want him to go back to a world that was going to kill him.
[HIS BODY IS HIDEOUS. His expression softens at what she says. He has more to say, BUT!!!]
This is about you and Arthur. About you telling him how you feel. I know we can't all be like Sidon and proudly claim love for someone, but... you should.
He gives her hands a squeeze gently.] Throne, I love you, but you are so stupid. [HE CAN SAY THIS BECAUSE HE ALSO WAS EXTREMELY FUCKING STUPID!!!!!!!! It's fine.]
Is this how everyone else felt with me? [Laughing.] That man likes you immensely. I would even go so far as to say he loves you.
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His eyes dip to the collar, then up again.]
That sounds about as insane as he acted, yes. [WEIRDO. WHY DID I SAY THAT DUDE WAS HOT NOOOOOOOOO. I GOT ZEUSIFIED!!!!!!!] ...I remember the shape of the key. If you ever... happened to want it.
I could make one.
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she exhales slow, looking down at their hands.]
... But I didn't earn it. [she says, finally. hesitantly. she's running out of reasons why she needs to keep it on, when people have tried so hard to find her a solution. it's a little scary to think of life without it. where does she go, after that? what does she do, when the only thing she's ever wanted is achieved?
a pause.]
Not... not yet. But maybe - before we leave. If we get the chance.
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His smile is small, but still reassuring. He reaches up to tuck some hair behind one of her ears.]
It's not something you have to earn, you know. Freedom... That's a right. That's a right everyone has, and you shouldn't ever have to do anything to earn it. But I understand.
If you decide to, I've always got it-- [Taps one of his temples.] I had one, too. In the rift. Even though I knew it wasn't true, it felt like a yoke I was supposed to have.
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you shouldn't have to earn it, he says, but. it doesn't change the fact that she feels like she needs to. she was so close. she was almost there, she was reaching for it, and then she woke up here. it feels wrong, to just have it.
maybe if she can make it to the end. maybe then she'll feel like she deserves it.]
... You get so used to it. [she opens her eyes again, looking at him.] It's always there.
[another sigh.]
When we first arrived, weeks ago, you told me that parents are supposed to love you. [...] You have seen, now, what it was like, but... your words stuck with me.
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They are. Parents should love their children more than anything. We were so poor we barely had a scrap to call our own, but my parents still loved me.
But, you know better than anyone, family isn't always flesh and blood. Family is who you make it. That's what's most important.
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and then very carefully, she smiles, looking up at him. it's a little bit of a fragile thing, but it's there, and it doesn't break or fade.]
Yes, I've... definitely found that to be the truth. [family is who you make it.] If anything, being here has only made that truth stronger.
Viktor, you have been gone so long, but... you are important to me. You were one of the first people to be kind to me without any expectation of something in return, here.
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You never tried to hurt me, so. Not even a rude word.
[He pulls his hands carefully away from hers, instead reaching up to put them behind her shoulders and beckon her forward toward himself. Hug! He's going to wrap one arm around her shoulders and rest one on the back of her head. He has learned A TOUCH!]
I hope you've been doing okay, Throné. And if you aren't, I don't mind listening.
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she goes easily! so much easier than she used to, she exhales shakily and just leans in and hugs him back, warm. she probably smells good, vanilla and campfire, pleasantly woodsy. she rests her head on his shoulder for a moment, fingers tangling into the back of his shirt.]
I'm alright. It's... been back and forth. [between like incredible amounts of despair and incredible amounts of joy, but] You told me to write down the things I wanted to tell you when we met in the virtual reality, and I did.
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GET HUGGED, IDIOD.]
I want to read it. [He squandered Sky's words, all of them written down for him to read after the worst happened. He won't do this with Throné.] I can't wait to read it actually, thank you.
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[she says, a little huffily, not letting go for a bit.]
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I wouldn't ever make fun of you for your feelings. I didn't about the book, right?
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I suppose. [he made fun of her a LITTLE but it's not enough to matter.]
... The biggest tell, I suppose, is about Arthur. Not that I've been subtle.
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You really haven't. You're in love, aren't you?
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anyway she chokes on a handful of cherry blossom colored petals.]
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Ah, you are. He does know, right?
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chokes on more flowers, this time olive and periwinkle among the cherry blossom. when she can manage to speak without choking, she just does the :bunsweat: emote in vibes.]
...
[BUNSWEATS LOUDER]
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Both of his brows riiiiiiise, and he kind of has a cross between an expectant look and a look that says he is understanding from her silence she did NOT tell him shit about fuck, and he probably didn't tell HER shit about fuck because they're both fucking STUPID.
(relatable)]
He... does know......... Right?
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coughs more petals.]
... No. [help]
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I see.
[POT. Kettle.]
You should tell him. Trust me. If you don't... you'll never forgive yourself.
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... I want to. [she says, rubbing at her face. she's like, scared to, though. what if he doesn't like her back, viktor ):]
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He lowers his hands to gathers her up again.] I was scared, [he admits.] Terrified. I am still very scared. [A pause. Quietly:] ...I've had this conversation already with someone. [Exasperated. He shakes his head.]
I am still very scared for so many reasons. I don't know how any of this is going to end. I was dead, and I could barely communicate. I had never... experienced these feelings before in my life. I'm sick... with no much longer to live. I was being blown up, I'm pretty sure, right before getting here. My body is... hideous, if I'm honest. Our lifespans may be completely different. I don't want to hurt anyone.
And that's just me.
...But I can't keep letting the present slip out of my fingers anymore because I'm too worried about all of that happening.
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[protests first actually, you shut up!! a pause, though, as she absorbs the rest of it. she allows him to take her hands, but squirms slightly. her collar feels so heavy around her neck.]
... I offered Lucien a place in Solistia, while we figure things out. If you want to come as well. I know that's a lot to consider, but... but I didn't want him to go back to a world that was going to kill him.
[worms out of talking about herself]
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This is about you and Arthur. About you telling him how you feel. I know we can't all be like Sidon and proudly claim love for someone, but... you should.
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she coughs up a bunch of the same flowers again, but thankfully it's into the crook of her elbow this time. bleeehhh.]
... I don't think I can handle it if he doesn't feel the same way. [she says, with a little helpless laugh.]
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He gives her hands a squeeze gently.] Throne, I love you, but you are so stupid. [HE CAN SAY THIS BECAUSE HE ALSO WAS EXTREMELY FUCKING STUPID!!!!!!!! It's fine.]
Is this how everyone else felt with me? [Laughing.] That man likes you immensely. I would even go so far as to say he loves you.
But what do I know? I've been dead for a while.
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